Working as a psychologist in Johannesburg I often sit across a nervous new client in their first session who usually begins with: “How does this work? I’m not sure what I should be doing…” First sessions, as discussed in previous posts, can be unnerving and the initial contacting of a psychologist and arriving for the first session is courageous. Beginning a psychotherapeutic journey is daunting, particularly if you are not familiar with how therapy works. While there is absolutely no need to prepare for therapy, there are some things that could be considered before you begin and hopefully the thoughts below will help alleviate some of the initial ‘starting out’ pressure that is often a concern of those unfamiliar with the process.
- Don't prepare
While this may seem counter-productive, there is no need to prepare for a therapy session. You have decided to begin therapy, and there will be things that you want to get off your chest initially, however, being honest and open about how you are feeling is the only preparation or expectation of you in a therapy session. While it may feel embarrassing or shameful to open up to your psychologist, particularly that they may be a stranger who you are encountering for the first time, it is important to try and be as honest as possible for your psychologist to get as full a picture of how you are feeling and what is going on internally for you.
- Time Keeping
The time offered to you is usually 50 minutes and both you and your psychologist have agreed on that time to focus on you. The consistency of time keeping on a specific day is part of the process – being late not only gives you less time with your therapist, it may also be communicating something that will need to be explored in the therapy.
- Speak up when uncomfortable
The whole point of therapy is developing a unique relationship with a trained professional that is completely different to any other relationship you may have. If your therapist says something to offend you or makes you uncomfortable, let them know. The therapeutic relationship is both sacred and paramount – it is the place to speak up and explore what may often be overlooked in other relationships, and raise self-awareness and ultimately change in dealing with issues that arise elsewhere.
- No topic is off limits
As your therapist will discuss with you in your first session, absolutely anything can be discussed in therapy, however, there is only one rule in therapy: your psychologist is bound by professional confidentiality, but if you reveal you are going to hurt yourself or someone else, your psychologist will break the confidentiality contract.
- Boundaries
Time keeping, confidentiality, the therapeutic relationship – these all form part of the boundaried nature of therapy. You and your therapist cannot be friends – the whole point of therapy is to create a relationship unlike any other for very good reasons. Again, speak up if you feel your therapist has violated this.
- You're free to terminate when you feel ready
Therapy is expensive, but it is an investment in you. There is a lot of misconception around therapy being a “luxury” and “indulgent”, however if you are committed to the process and the fit with your therapist is a good one, it will probably be the best money you will ever spend. That said, there is a lot of anxiety about the long-term nature of therapy, and while being in therapy will be beneficial, you are also allowed to terminate when you feel ready to, and begin again if that feel appropriate at a later stage. Your therapist will explore this decision with you, but, again, this will ultimately be your decision.
We are a team of two psychologists in Johannesburg at Parkview Practice hope this helps inform your decision to begin your psychotherapy journey. Please click on our “Meet the Team” tab to see our individual profiles to further help you decide who might be a good fit for you.
